Saturday, April 23, 2011

What happens when you turn 25?

Gee, I'm just a few hours away from officially hitting twenty five. Technically I am already right now, but not really yet- because the morning hasn't cracked and I was born at 10 in the evening  ;-) 

Anyway, this day is not just any lavish excuse to throw a wild birthday party one last time- bidding goodbye to a couldn't-care-less attitude we had in my 20's. Neither is it a ticking time bomb before our youthful glow vanishes; nor a much feared reminder to start ticking items in our bucket list before reaching 30. But why fear when this is actually a point when great transformations are primed to happen. 


Twenty five is the age of reason where the mind is fully developed to make rational decisions, however, it doesn't make it any easier for us to choose which path to take, as errors in this point will not be as easy to correct as it was 5 years ago.

Maybe going back to school as a 20 year old kid was a decision you would take without even thinking as time is in your hands to exploit, but add another 5 years to the equation and at 25, that option may not exactly be a gamble worth the jackpot. Or say would you stay in a lousy relationship with a person you see no future with? At 20, hope can keep that relationship alive but come 25, the only option is to find more an investment that will provide a better return.

I believe reaching 25 is one of those pivotal moments in our life where we cannot help but reassess how life has been in the past quarter of a century. There comes an expectation for us to fit into the norm. So what would a 25 year old person be committed to at this day and time? We don't want to veer away from 'normalcy' and try to live up to our own and most especially to our family and peer's expectations.

It's the rising point leading to climax at a story plot. Reaching 25 would make you pause, and wonder whether or not the path you are standing at this moment is the still the same direction you want to see yourself 5- 10 years from now.  The more we get older it seems that time is becoming a scarcity and that quality transcends quantity.  


10 years ago I couldn't wait to grow up and be one of those adults who ruled the world. I wanted to be a woman of power and become rich, beautiful and successful. Thinking about it now, I realise that it was nothing but a safe aspiration. Yes I had the vision, which is better than having nothing at all, but I had no exact plan for execution.

In my mind, I was driven enough to pursue anything that will come my way, but there was one thing I missed. I was not courageous enough to put into concrete terms what that ‘anything’ is supposed to mean. “Lawyer”, “Accountant”, “Entrepreneur”, “Journalist”, “Dancer” and “Actor” would have filled the blanks and I would have arrive at the same end point of success. 

 Letting Go

I feel as if in a few hours I will be given a life sentence to a prison they call 'real life'-where an attempt to escape is seen as a mortal sin rather than an act of jest and a moment to breathe. So no more games for me? Not entirely, but it probably means playing with calculated risk this time around because the stakes are higher.

I don't want to be the girl who refuses to grow up but I still do want to visit Neverland from time to time. We sometimes have that love-hate relationship with children because they are animated creatures who happened to be brats- but the thing I love most about them (that I want to stay with me) is their sense of wonder!  And with the good comes the bad, thus being mature means letting go of being childish about life: throwing tantrums and non-stop whining!

The next 25 years will be the most productive years ahead of me and I doubt that this is the last time I'll be having such a mid-life crisis. Twenty five is just the beginning of this roll- it's the time when career, family, self discovery and everything else will reach its fullest potential, so the best way to deal with it is to just live and let go!  

Tuesday, April 19, 2011

Something you don't hear everyday from your dentist

Sometimes the most important lessons in life do not come from the ‘life experts’ or gurus we all run after to seek advice.  The answers we long to find does not necessarily need to be found elsewhere,  you may already know it but you just need someone to remind it for you.  

I realised this might be true- a week ago when I was in my least philosophic moment- how could you be when you are about to anticipate pain in one of your most sensitive areas. My mind was busy, rather in panic mode as I was trying to calm down my nerves.  I was a few moments away from a tooth extraction.

The least thing my dentist could do was to assure me it’s gonna be alright- and so she did a cleaning first before taking out one of my precious whites. Before the procedure, I asked her if she could straighten my left front tooth but she said I need braces for that. 

With a smile, I said that I was just referring to straightening the edge of the tooth (not the whole tooth itself). And so she did with drilling machine, then handed to me a mirror so I can check it out. I tried to conceal my blah expression but she read it right away- because I really didn't notice any  difference.

But she explained that going further ‘to correct it’ will cause more unevenness. (True, why fix it if it ain’t broken?) And then the unexpected I heard, coming from a professional more likely trained to criticise and look for something to fix - she said: It doesn't have to be perfect because that shows character- that's what makes you unique.

All this time I've been running away from something I shouldn't really be afraid of- from being flawed downright to a self made agony of a painless tooth extraction. Oh well... Life really has a way of giving you an assuring pat on the shoulder when you least expect it. :)